First Date Fart
call it a way of weeding them out—
the too uptight ones
the insane, pretty ones
the ones like so many Jersey girls
I’ve known…
obsessed with appearances
I’ll make it look
like an accident—
“Whoops! Sorry about that!”
any reaction
but laughter
will be an immediate
red flag—
because if THIS
is a problem
what else
will I have to hide?
Horror Sleaze Trash 
A ‘foul’ but ‘strong’ truth that’s good to know beforehand. I mean, if you are having intercourse via the anus, and the poor girl releases waste on your organ….well, all we can do as gentlemen is smile, comfort, and keep strong.
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….because you fuckin dat ass homeboy!
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