David J. Thompson

Part Of The Show

I’ve always been afraid of clowns,
coulrophobia, I guess they call it.
In fact, I remember the first time
I saw a clown up close in person,
I wet my pants. Unfortunately,
this happened just yesterday
at a backyard birthday party
for my friends’ grandson.
When the rent-a-clown tried
to give me a comic hug, I lost
control of my bladder in fear.
The little kids all noticed and started
to laugh hysterically; they thought 
it was part of the show. I started
them singing Happy Birthday,
covered my darkened crotch
with my baseball cap, and walked
hurriedly to my car, thankful
it was only piss that the goddamn clown
scared out of me. It could have been
a whole lot worse.

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