Paul Tanner

pervs without sluts 

mum’s got a job in a morgue. 
she’s not trained or nothing, but they’re letting her help out
as some trainee assistant blood drainer, or something like that.
she said she’ll take me some time to watch.  
if she leaves the room to go the toilet or whatever,
I could suck a tit. maybe stick my fingers in the corpse’s fanny.
maybe more. 

jesus, don’t you have any imagination? I asked.  
wank about it if you have to. 
but you don’t have to actually do it. 

it’s ok, he said. they’re dead. they can’t fight back. 
and anyway, you don’t need their permission,
cos it’s not them anymore. it’s just a body. their soul’s gone. 

or, I suggested, you could just, you know, 
go and meet someone real and maybe charm them? 

he shook his head. you’ve got no ambition, he sighed. 

look, if it’s the lifeless thing that does it for you,
at least, I don’t know, get a mannequin or something. I don’t know. 

a mannequin! he clapped his hands. shit, of course! 
bit hard, all that plastic, like. but I can always drill holes in them 
and put like, cotton in them or something, can’t I? no, 
not cotton, fluff would stick to me bell end. what can I …

warm jelly? I proposed, before I could stop myself. 

warm jelly! genius! he hugged me. you’re a genius, you are! 
can you get me one? your shop does clothes, doesn’t it? 
they have mannequins, don’t they? you could get me one,
couldn’t you?

I didn’t say anything. 

or do you have already have one? you do, don’t you? 
you’ve already nicked one. 
that’s how you knew to use warm jelly, wasn’t it?

I didn’t say anything. 

and you can’t steal another, because then they’ll be onto you. 
well that’s ok, I can just borrow yours. what’s her name?

Rosanna, I said.  

nice. nice slutty name, that. so can I borrow Rosanna? 
I’ll put my own jelly in her. 

she left me, I said. 

he narrowed his eyes and studied me.
you’re weird, he concluded …

couple of days later, I’m walking to work 
and a car horn beeps.
I turn and it’s him and his mum.
he waves out of the passenger window. 

they on their way to the morgue? I wondered. 
wait till Rosanna hears about this. 

BLACK SUMMER, Reviewed By Mather Schneider

BLACK SUMMER: New & Selected Poems
Kung Fu Treachery Press
234 pages

Things you will not see in Wayne F. Burke’s bio for his new book, Black Summer: pronouns, accrued university degrees, editorships at magazines, grants received, where he teaches, how beautiful his wife is, how he loves gardening, the name of his cat. How he got a book published without these things in his bio, I have no idea. He has been reported.

Wayne F. Burke is 65 (going on 66) years old. He reminds me a little of Ed Galing, who wrote poems into his 90’s. When I used to see Galing in a publication I always read his poems first not because he was old but because I knew he wouldn’t bullshit me. I knew there would be no slickness or pretentiousness, no metaphors stretched out so far you forgot where they started, no look-at-me-being-a-poet, pat me on the head, junk. Just a sensitive, sometimes fucked-up, lonely person writing about the moments of his life. 

There are lots of stray hairs in these poems. Yes, Burke, like Galing, ends lines with prepositions sometimes. Yes, his endings fizzle sometimes. Yes, he’s an old cis white guy who doesn’t hide his flaws. All unforgiveable sins these days, when most poets pretend to be saints. 

Burke is no saint, and what fresh air that is:  

“I walked upstream through the 
woods, among the trees 
and rocks 
to a quiet place 
below the falls 
I took my pants off 
and sat 
in the sun 
I was having a herpes attack 
boils on my dick 
and thought the sun 
might fix me up a little
as I listened to the river…” 

One out of 6 people have herpes but you don’t see it mentioned much in poetry. Usually when a poet sits down by the river it’s to tell the reader how enlightened they are, which always somehow seems to indicate how UNENLIGHTENED the rest of us are. Why didn’t you USE A CONDOM? 

At least he’s getting laid by real women and not watching porn. He’s an old timer. Never married, though, at least not in these poems. Now that he’s retired, maybe he will meet a nice Mexican girl. 

Burke asked a “famous” poet to read his poems and wrote this about it:  

“he was known as the poet of loneliness and
was married to the poetess of bereavement.
Before leaving, I asked what he really thought of
my things, and
he said, well
they are all on the surface
no depth to them;
read other things beside literature, he suggested
like “Kramer’s book on aesthetics.”
I thanked him and he left.
I was the poet of surfaceness.”

I like that he says “surfaceness” instead of “surfaces,” as if to poke fun at himself and at the same time to make fun of the “famous” poet. Of course, the “famous” poet meant that his poems were superficial. What this means to me is the “famous” poet couldn’t see beyond the “surface” of the poems, which are not refined or polished as most poets like them to be. In my view, poems that are most polished on the surface don’t have more depth, just more make-up.     

Fighting and real-world conflict are everywhere in these poems:

Punks   

standing on the main street of Framingham, Massachusetts
holding my thumb up
in the air
and watching all the cars in the world
drive by me
and all the drivers look like assholes
to me
and a car goes past with some punks inside
and one punk gives me the middle-finger
and I turn and chase the car
as the punks point and
laugh at me until
their car slows then stops at a red light
and I gain ground
and the smiles of the punks disappear
their eyes widen like doll’s eyes
and the car squeals out and
I chase it to the
next light
and the punks in the back seat hop around
like monkeys in a cage
as I close the gap again
and the car shoots ahead
and I chase it to the next red light
which the car blows through
and I give up,
out of breath
still pissed
but not really
about 
a bunch of punks.

I thought this poem was funny and sad at the same time. Who can’t feel the desperation of this narrator, running down the street like a crazy pissed-off loser? Who hasn’t wanted to do the same? The ending lines tell us what we already feel: this is not just about surfaces.  

Burke makes me laugh. I smiled and laughed throughout this book:

Moider    

a squirrel in the park, plump
7 to 8 inches in height
svelte gray coat
attacked a girl
who later died
and the cops went berserk
guns blasting and
killed two hundred squirrels
but none of the witnesses
to the attack
could positively ID the perp
so the cops put out an APB with
an artist’s sketch of
the killer-squirrel
which brought 1000 calls
into the station house
but
as of this writing
the suspect remains at large
possibly
up a tree
or
in some hole in a wall.

Burke’s childhood poems are some of the best in the collection:

Beach    

a hot muggy day 
no one to play with 
all the kids gone 
to the beach 
Charlie Baguette told me I could go 
with him 
his family 
I ran home for my suit 
and when I returned 
they had already gone…
I climbed the tree in the yard 
and sat 
hidden by dinner-plate-sized leaves. 
I picked my nose until it bled;
meanwhile, the sky turned milky-white and 
I was glad (maybe 
the Baguette’s would be drowned 
in the coming storm). 
I climbed down and lay in the 
driveway on hot cinder 
that felt like sand; 
I hoped I got run over.
I watched a bird 
a speck 
far above 
until
it disappeared.

In another poem, the narrator child is waiting for “gramps” to come and give him a ride home from “pee wee” football practice, but gramps is late. The kid climbs a tree while waiting and someone throws a rock at him, calling him a raccoon. Kids climb trees all the time, but in this situation, it highlights the isolation of the boy. Gramps finally shows up and the poem ends with Gramps giving “a mumbled apology.” Not a very dramatic ending. Maybe Burke could have “worded” it a different way. Maybe a certain type of “line break” would have made it better. But if you’ve ever been the last kid standing, waiting for a ride home, from anywhere, you’ll understand.   

I really liked this sweet poem, “Ice Cream.” An editor would surely quip about the title and the lack of punctuation, but would that really change anything? Would that change the idiocy of pubescent kids? Would that change the innocence? Should we refine natural metaphor into over-your-head metaphor? In order to write a simple poem like this, you have to have grown old and stayed young at the same time:  

Ice Cream    

A maple walnut ice cream cone
10-cents 
at Eileen’s Dairy bar 
where Rose 
a teenage waitress 
Eileen’s daughter 
tall and slender, 
“a rose yet to bloom” 
I told Johnny Garibaldi 
who had asked what I thought 
of her 
the words coming unbidden from 
my lips 
he blabbed it 
and I regretted many times over 
a rose yet to bloom 
shouted on the street 
on the school bus 
I stayed away from Eileen’s until 
desperate for an ice cream 
pistachio, butter pecan, black raspberry
I put my thin dime 
into Rose’s hand 
and she did not say 
anything 
except 
“thank you.”

Several short poems are included in the book. I don’t know if they’re haiku or what, but I like them:

Palm Sunday—
my brother and I
whip each other with palms

and

My jacket—
hung by the neck
until spring

This is a good book of poetry. Like most books of poetry, it could be cut by a third. The problem is, every person who reads it might want to cut a different third. Not bad, for an old cis white guy who doesn’t even have a cat in his bio and probably never been to a writer’s conference in his whole miserable life.

BUY A COPY HERE

Daniel S. Irwin

Johnny Cash Sang

In the old song,
Johnny Cash sang that
He took a shot of cocaine
And shot his woman down.
Now, that just ain’t right.  
He musta been doin’
Something wrong.
If you do a proper shot of coke
You ain’t doin’ mucha nothin’ 
For a while.  Just kickin’ back 
Goin’ with the feelin’ and
Not even givin’ a shit that
Your woman’s no good.
Hell, you ain’t even gonna
Make it to work if you got a job.
You don’t even give a shit
‘Bout the curtains fluttering
By the ashtray catching fire.
It’s a free light show and 
When you come down enough,
You might manage to escape.
Best you can do is float out 
Onto the front lawn enjoyin’
The lay in the cool grass.
The ambulance guys come and
Give you oxygen and that
Makes you laugh just before
You up chuck all last night’s
Pizza and beer.

J.J. Campbell

with a tear in my eye

woke up on the edge
of the world watching 
the sunrise with a tear 
in my eye
 
every magical moment
of my adult life has been 
spent alone
 
unless i’m going to count
all these bottles as the 
friends that would never 
leave me
 
it’s the quiet nights
 
the nights where the pain
cuts a little deeper
 
where i wonder how long
it is going to take to find 
my body
 
when you slip through
the cracks there are no 
calls to the police for 
them to check on you
 
i’d love to move to
someplace where 
i could die alone
 
just the casual sound
of water as i drift away
 
ashes spread along
some coast i never
got to enjoy
 
i’m sure the poems will
be good enough to help 
start a fire

Ben Newell

Somalia

Not even 10 minutes ago
I signed for my neighbor’s package,
a rather suspicious-looking package 
shipped all the way from some distant land.  

Somalia?  

Beats me;
the writing on the label 
is far too poor to decipher. 

In retrospect
this wasn’t a wise move on my part.

I shouldn’t have heeded the knocking 
on his door across the landing,
shouldn’t have emerged from my lair
to play Mr. Helpful Fellow Tenant…

“I’ll see that he gets this,”
I said to the mail carrier. 

And I will—

The sooner I part with this thing, 
the better.  

For all I know 
I’m currently in possession of cocaine,
ecstasy, anthrax, explosives, child pornography
or even a snuff film. 

Don’t get me wrong.

He seems like a nice enough guy.  

Quiet, keeps to himself. 

But that’s pretty much what
the neighbors said about Dahmer, 
after the cops found a head
in his refrigerator.

Jon Bennett

Proof I’m a Great Artist 

My parents were folk dancing 
you may wonder what type 
Balkan folk dancing 
it was always Balkan or Greek 
until mother weakened 
then it was just father 
doing Scottish reel dancing 
Anyhow, they were doing Balkan 
folk dancing 
in a community center somewhere 
Off to the side  
I had my G.I. Joe doll 
and was putting him through his paces 
He ran along the weird 
institutional wainscoting 
across the backs of folded metal chairs 
he did flips, G.I. Joe did, 
occasionally flew, spun 
Yes, I really put him through his paces 
A woman was watching me 
I was cute, 6 or 7,  
and she came up and said, 
“You’re going to be an artist.” 
I remember little of my childhood 
but this proclamation stands out 
it’s an ego thing 
So now I sit here 
with my feathered quill pen, 
my brushes, paints, the kiln, 
the marble blocks and chisels 
and my voluminous  
silken ascots 
still seeking validation 
it’s like a soul-sized hangnail 
following me through life 
So I’m vicious, laying waste  
to my competitors 
with my razor sharp tongue 
I was good with that G.I. Joe 
but maybe the woman was wrong 
maybe what it meant was 
I’d make a good 
soldier. 

J.J. Campbell

the sweet nectar of death

they never warn you as a 
young poet about the nights 
alone
 
digging through the garbage
for a meal
 
that all the good poems will 
come to you while taking 
a shit
 
that no one wants to read
anything other than what
they have written themselves
 
there is no money in it for you 
until you taste the sweet nectar 
of death
 
yet here we all are
 
scribbling down random thoughts 
and swearing someone is going to 
nourish the genius trapped between 
each phrase
 
there are no rich women to take 
care of us
 
no fans mailing you dirty underwear 
from another country
 
hell, even the stalkers have given up
 
it’s an old barn in the middle of nowhere
 
the trusty shotgun from the corner
 
the last bottle of scotch you’ll ever 
get to enjoy

Daniel S. Irwin

Spirits

Spirits come to me in the night.
My fault: bad booze, cheap dope.
Or rather, cheap booze, bad dope.
That compounded with insomnia.
My visitors always want to talk.
I could care less, but they stay.
A volley of mangled refrains in
Bygone dirges of hopelessness
Spoken by headless chickens.
A good host, I compliment them
On their flawless French, though
I don’t understand a word of it.

Randall Rogers

Solution

What if you didn’t
grow up with TV,
radio, or anything 
electrical except 
lightning (and firefly)?
You’d read if you could,
train physically, play, write (if able),
speak, perform at the theater and home.
You’d ponder, drink wine, feast plenty, consult oracles, 
engage in blood-thirsty politics, civil war,
cult religion, human sacrifice, 
you’d avoid proscription,
attend circuses and gladiatorial games,
puke in a vomitorium, be real stoic
and long for Jesus.

Charles Rammelkamp

Tina James Raises Her Voice

Joy and Iyana started it,
sent out a flier to organize
the protest at Baltimore City Hall,
about forty of us exotic dancers
there to demand our jobs back.

Other live entertainment had re-opened
after the mayor’d shut everything
because of the coronavirus,
why not adult entertainment, too?

I’ve been dancing ten years now,
but since Fantasies closed a few months ago,
I’ve had to go back to my FedEx job
just to make ends meet.
I used to make enough dancing
just two nights a week,
then be home with my kids.
Now? The schedule’s just too much
to juggle work and virtual learning.

Some of my friends’ve turned to websites
where they post nudie sex videos,
interact online with subscribers,
but that’s just not me. 

So yeah, I drove down from Pennsylvania
to protest outside City Hall,
and when Iyana called out 
through that pink megaphone,
“WHO ARE WE?”
I yelled back, 
full-throated as MLK’s Dream speech,
“STRIPPERS!”

“WHAT DO WE WANT?”

“OUR JOBS BACK!”