Paul Tanner

chinked kink

I dragged her by the hair.
stop! she kicked. please!  
shut up! I gave her a slap
and cuffed her to the radiator’s pipe.
no, seriously! she said, my phone’s in the other room! 
so?
so my dad’s still in the hospital! what if someone rings? 
don’t care, I shrugged. in fact, I hope he dies. 
then I’ll adopt you and be your new daddy, won’t I?

I left and went to the shop on the corner. got a little thing of milk. 
some Doritos. pack of custard creams. Sanjeev asked me if
I saw the match. told him I don’t follow football. but you’re
from Liverpool, he wailed. home of the greatest team in the world!
it’s boring, I said. bunch of rich shampoo models prancing about.
now hockey, that’s a game. can I have a bag, please? 

I got back and peeked my head in.

well? I asked. 
to be honest, she shrugged, I could take or leave it.
I didn’t go too far?
no, it was exactly like we said, it’s just … 
she looked around the room … well, kind of boring. 
yeah, I agreed. bit forced, isn’t it. 
yeah, that’s it, she said. it’s too over the top, really. and 
it’s boring, just lying here, waiting for you.  
fair enough. want me to uncuff you? 
please, daddy.

then we ate all the custard creams 
watching two seasons of Friends. 

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