C.M. Crockford

I Saw This Horrible Evil Entity and Now I’m Pretty Much Done

I suppose you’re wondering why I’m here. Well to make a long story short, I…witnessed a massive, ancient cosmic creature emerge from the sea and I’m pretty much done. Donezo. I mean with life: like physically, mentally emotionally, I am out. Once you’ve seen an ancient monolith emerge from the depths you can forgot posting pictures of your dinner on Instagram or hanging with old frat buddies, am I right?

And I had a life too! Like, interests and shit – foosball night at Ruby’s was the best! At least until understanding my hollow, miniscule place in the universe made me completely lose any interest. I cannot emphasize enough how much seeing a tentacled beast deity emit a blaring roar then slink back into dark waters changes you, for better or worse.

…It’s all worse. I cannot make that more clear.

After all, at the time, I was an explorer, swashbuckling my way through intrepid lands, searching for the unknown…fine, I was a tourist, but I madethe effort to learn bits of Peruvian and whatever the other language was. Of course I’ve stopped caring about other cultures, or really about anything an hour after the great malevolent god emerged from its slumber. Eh, maybe half an hour after. “Time is a flat octagon” or whatever that Texas guy said in that show. I saw like one episode but I hated the Yellow Queen bullshit.

So, in hindsight, yeah, I probably shouldn’t have wandered onto that mysterious beach late at night, but shit man, it looked really cool! Even with the cloaked priests chanting some weird Arabic language and those dark clouds overhead. How was I to know they’d all kill themselves and awaken a huge octopus?! Just my luck. I even got locked up for gibbering about “the slumbering darkness below” or whatever I was saying. I blacked out eventually.

So as you can see from our surroundings I’ve been technicallydeemed insane by the state. You say “insane”, I say “prophet of the coming doom” – you say “Tomato”, I say “Tomata”. I guess I can’t complain though, especially being that I’ll be a tortured, helpless plaything for the Old Ones any day now, so the sanitarium really isn’t bad. Que sera sera. Plus the food here is pretty good, especially the pudding. Did you try the pudding? Excellent distraction from the oblivion that awaits.

Anyway it was great talking to you and thanks for the visit. Hope your story goes well. I’m going to go patiently wait for the inevitable alien hellscape in my room, get some more pudding beforehand. Have a good one! Hope the many tentacled Gods kill you first instead of enslave you!